this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
