Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Its about making memories worth repressing
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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