I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
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