It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
