It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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