I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
We had sex on a dog bed..
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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