i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
