so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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