I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
