grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
