what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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