in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
