Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
