the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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