I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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