yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
