just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
