I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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