If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
