Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
