The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Randomize
