you have to choose: penises or morals?
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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