porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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