Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
