All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
