I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
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