just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
