i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
