Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
he shaved USA in his pubs
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
