Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Randomize
