we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
The adults are the big ones right?
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
