some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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