I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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