I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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