i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
