Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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