i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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