So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
