Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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