is your mom at the bar?
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
