Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
you made out with another girl for some wings
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
