I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
