____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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