We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
