Non-Jews are for practice
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Randomize