everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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