I feel like abortions should bother me more
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
