6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
