In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
