the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Are these your boobs on my camera?
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
