can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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